Relationships: Relationship Building & Management

Controlling Relationships - Who Controls the Focus of Your Attention?

As long as you have blood running through your veins, you own the right to make executive decisions about where you place your attention. Did you know that? If you are or have been in an abusive relationship, you might be saying, "Really?"

When in an abusive relationship, we become accustomed to others telling us where to focus our attention, how to fix our problems and how to...exist. It's the nature of the beast.

And we are conditioned to believe that we need that direction. But..."Is it true? Does it support your highest good?

Read Dr. King's entire article Controlling Relationships - Who Controls the Focus of Your Attention?

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships Expert

Reading Body Language

While in Salt Lake City for Kirk Duncan's "Present Yourself" training, I had the opportunity to interview Kirk about body language. In this video, Kirk critiques my body language and helps me figure out where I'm limiting myself and how I can break free to achieve greater results in my life than I am already.

Take a look at this fun video to learn more about how to improve your body language...

 

9 Keys for a Stress-free Pregnancy and Childbirth

1. Dont let anxiety and stress take a toll: There is a growing body of research that shows anxiety and stress, in some women, lead to pre-term birth, smaller babies, and potential problems later for the child from respiratory illness and developmental delays.

2. It takes simple steps: Reduce the stress risk by using techniques from yoga and meditation. The March of Dimes suggests meditation and exercise designed for pregnant women as effective stress techniques. There are CDs specifically for pregnant women that help enormously. They can even be used during delivery and after the baby is born.

Read Dr. Miles' entire article 9 Keys for a Stress-free Pregnancy and Childbirth

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

How to Read Body Language

I went to Salt Lake City last week to attend Kirk Duncan's "Present Yourself" training. While there, I had the opportunity to interview Kirk about body language and the importance of it. The following video is one that we did together.

Find out what your body language is saying about you and how to adjust it to reap better results in your life, business and relationships:

 

Domestic Abuse Therapy: When Marital Therapy Helps and When It Hurts

There is a lot of confusion over whether marital/couples therapy will help couples in abusive relationships.

You may have heard that marital therapy is not the proper modality for domestic abuse. Even stronger, you may realize that marital therapy is actually contra-indicated in the treatment of intimate partner abuse.

Then, you may also realize that some couples who deal with abusive control issues in their relationship can learn to develop new skills to facilitate their use of non-violent and non-abusive behavioral responses with their intimate partner.

Read Dr. King's entire article Domestic Abuse Therapy: When Marital Therapy Helps and When It Hurts

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships Expert

8 Keys to Improving Self-esteem for Teenage Girls

Experts on facial expressions are not fooled by the big smiles of teen-age girls. It is evident when a girl is truly happy inside, because she has a "Duchienne smile." With this smile the involuntary muscles around the eyes are wrinkled. And those muscles do not lie.

On the other hand, fake, superficial smiles reveal a smiling mouth only, there is no twinkle and not a wrinkle. Looking at many of the photos in today's magazines where the models often reveal fake smiles with sad eyes. BUT, this is not what teen girls notice. They focus on the perfect figure, airbrushed skin, hair and slick image. Then, unfortunately, they want to emulate that MYTH of happiness.

Read Dr. Miles' entire article 8 Keys to Improving Self-esteem for Teenage Girls

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

Happiness is a Choice

I remember the moment it happened. I was listening intently as the seminar presenter quoted Eleanor Roosevelt when she said, "No one can make me feel inferior without my consent." Immediately the power of those words sunk deep into my heart and I thought, "That's wonderful! That means no one can make me angry unless I allow it. And no one can offend me without my permission! That means . . . happiness is a choice!"
I decided right then and there to make conscious choices about how I respond to others and to my circumstances. I resolved, in that moment, to refuse to be offended by anyone.

Read Paula's entire article Happiness is a Choice

Paula Fellingham, our official Strengthening Women and Families

Controlling People - How to Deal with Someone Who Always Tells You That You're Wrong

How do you deal with someone who is verbally abusive and tells you that you are always wrong? This is a good question and a concern shared by many men and women.

Have you ever noticed that some people will always come out "right" no matter what the exchange is regarding? And in order for them to hold this position, you are assigned the position of being "wrong" irrespective of actual facts.

Now it happens that these folks who always need to be right are merely seeking control.

Read Dr. King's entire article Controlling People - How to Deal with Someone Who Always Tells You That You're Wrong

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships expert