Relationships: Relationship Building & Management

Understanding Men: How to Understand Men Better

Over the years, women have had many experiences in trying to understand men. In your quest to understand men, you will discover that they usually have vague ideas on what they really want or need from a woman. They say one thing and seem to do another. They send mixed messages that often leave you feeling confused and bewildered.

Perhaps if women were to start thinking like men, it would make this whole man and woman relationship a whole lot easier. So the next time your man does something that irritates you, try putting yourself in his shoes.

Women have a tendency to lament about problems because they want their problems to be acknowledged, while men complain about problems because they are asking for solutions. These are just a few concepts from the book 'Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus.' Obviously there are differences between women and men's viewpoints and how they react under stress.

Read Stephany's entire article Understanding Men: How to Understand Men Better

Stephany Alexander, our official Dating Expert

8 Keys to Lasting Love

My granddaughter, Merritt Miles, at five years old, was the inspiration for, 8 Keys to Lasting Love. While reading her a fairy tale I was very disturbed by what I was about to say to her when I read; "And they lived happily ever after."

So, I took the liberty of changing the ending to, "They began the work of creating a very good marriage." I didn't want Merritt thinking, as so many of my clients had, that marriage was so simple, that it just magically happened and couples lived happily every after.

As a marriage and family therapist for thirty years, I have seen the pain people experience after the honeymoon is over, when they awaken realizing they have married a mere mortal. I hope my granddaughter, as she enters adulthood, will avoid the pitfalls and pain of those who succumb to this "happily ever after" myth.

Read Dr. Miles' entire article 8 Keys to Lasting Love

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

Women's Issues: What Does a Woman Celebrating Life Look Like?

Several years ago I created an organization called "Women Celebrating Life" to discuss women's issues and help women re-invigorate their lives. Today I'd like to ask the question, "What does a woman who celebrates her life look like?"

I believe she's like you and me -- trying her best to live a joyful, fulfilled life. Some days she's on top of the world, happily going through her day with a light heart.

Other days, days when her heart is hurt, she aches. Perhaps someone misunderstood her, or was unkind. Maybe she sees what she isn't and yearns to be more.

Read Paula's entire article Women's Issues: What Does a Woman Celebrating Life Look Like?

Paula Fellingham, our official Strengthening Women and Families Expert

When Parents Control - 3 Keys to Breaking Free from Parental Control

A controlling parent can have as much a crippling effect on an adult child as on an intimate partner. And I'm sure you know why.

But help for that adult child is touch and go. There are no shelters for them, yet they have many of the same financial issues as battered women.

If they haven't risen above their controlling parent's domination, they can become entrapped victims for life. They remain dependent and often spend their lives seeking out ways to work out their unfinished business around being controlled.

Read Dr. King's entire article When Parents Control - 3 Keys to Breaking Free from Parental Control

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships Expert

Stop Dragging Your Past into Present Relationships Part Two of Two

he rapture phase of love gives each partner a feeling that is buoyant, lively, and fulfilling. You project onto your partner images of beauty, goodness, and love as if your partner were a canvas waiting to be painted on. The energy of this consciousness shines a bright light across the world, obliterating all the differences in your characters, lifting you and your partner to a higher state of being. You are atop the summit, and you sparkle to one another like diamonds with many facets of light.

This is as it should be. Robert Johnson observed that falling in love is meant to be an initiation into a world much greater than the individual: an introduction to the ideals of love, truth, and beauty that transcend the personal ego and ordinary life.

Read Dr. Miles entire article Stop Dragging Your Past into Present Relationships Part Two of Two

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

The Power of Choice

How often are we aware that we control the choices we make? It doesn't matter what the situation, every decision is a choice. Linda Larsen says it best: "Everything in my life I create, promote, allow or step in. If there is something in my life I no longer choose -- I take full responsibility for changing it. I am in the driver's seat. And, I love it."

When I first came across her quote, I was struck by its simplicity and impact. We control our lives. We control our choices. We have the freedom to control our thoughts, our actions and outcome! Imagine a life when we can't blame others for what happens to us. Imagine a life where our choices provide us with the life we desire. Imagine a world where everyone assumes responsibility for their lives! Just imagine!

Read Bonnie's entire article The Power of Choice

Bonnie Ross-Parker, our official Networking Expert

Surviving Infidelity: Advice on How to Survive Infidelity

Life certainly has its challenges, but little compares to the enormous task of healing from infidelity. Many marriage therapists have well confirmed that the clients who visit them have confessed that the discovery of an affair was the lowest, darkest moment of their entire lives. And because affairs shatter the general trust, many people seriously contemplate ending their marriages. However, it is important to know that, no matter bleak things might seem, it is possible to revitalize a marriage wounded by infidelity. It is not so easy: there are no quick fix, one-size-fits-all solutions. But years of experience has taught that there are definite patterns to what people in loving relationships do to bring their marriages back from the brink of disaster.

Surviving infidelity involves teamwork; both spouses should be fully committed to the hard work of getting their marriages back on track. The unfaithful partner must be willing to end the affair and do whatever it takes to win back the trust of his/her spouse. The betrayed spouse should be willing to find ways to manage overwhelming emotions so, as a couple, they can start to sort out how the affair happened, and more importantly, what needs to change so that it never happens again. Although no two people, marriages or paths to recovery are similar, it is helpful to know that healing typically happens in stages.

Read Stephany's entire article Surviving Infidelity: Advice on How to Survive Infidelity

Stephany Alexander, our official Dating Expert