Relationships: Relationship Building & Management

It is always about me, isn't it?

A characteristic of childhood thinking is the child’s assumption that whatever happens “is all about me.” The tendency of children to blame themselves for their parents’ difficulties causes them great pain, and if this kind of “it’s all about me” thinking persists into adulthood, it can do considerable harm to their personal relationships. As adults, many people still believe they are defective and that if people really knew them they would be rejected.

Children under the age of ten have yet to develop a concept of multi-causality. Consequently, they explain out-of-the-ordinary phenomena as having occurred because they made them happen.

Read Dr. Miles' entire article It is always about me, isn't it?

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

Becoming And Staying Successful as a Woman Entrepreneur

Becoming & Staying Successful in Business Ten Top Ways! By Bonnie Ross-Parker

1. Money allows a business to thrive.

Must have a personal financial plan. Determine how much you have to invest, how much you're willing to risk, and how much you will need to live on during your expansion phase. Consult with a CPA, financial advisor or anyone that helps you w/finances. Be really clear about your commitment and the effort involved.

2. Develop and implement clear systems so you remain consistent in all transactions.

Have a plan for everything. Clear, concise directions in written form for how the business operates is imperative for 1.

Read Bonnie's entire article Becoming And Staying Successful as a Woman Entrepreneur

Bonnie Ross-Parker, our official Networking Expert

You’re Married to an Alcoholic: What To Do? What To Do?

"My Partner is a Functioning Alcoholic"
Being married to a functioning alcoholic can cause many problems in a family. Tens of thousands of families in North America alone are struggling with this issue.

A drinking problem can begin in many ways. For some people it begins with social drinking. Social drinking can gradually deteriorate into alcohol abuse and eventually into alcohol dependence. The drinking became a habit and the habit became alcohol dependence or alcoholism. It matters not whether the alcohol is in the form of beer, wine or hard liquor. Alcohol is alcohol in any shape or form.

Read Dr. Neill's entire article You’re Married to an Alcoholic: What To Do? What To Do?

Dr. Neill Neill, our official Overcoming Alcoholism Expert

Abusive Relationship and Your Health: 5 Tips to Insure Proper Digestion for Domestic Abuse Survivors

We hear that you are "what you eat." True. And you are also "how you eat," and "when you eat."

How you eat and when you eat determines how we assimilate what we eat. This, of course, is how nourishing the food we eat will be for us.

Mealtime in an abusive home

Living in an abusive relationship can influence the how you eat. You can come to the dinner table and sit down to criticism, nitpicking, outright belittlement that can go from "let me count the ways I hate you" to a major family feud.

Read Dr. King's entire article Abusive Relationship and Your Health: 5 Tips to Insure Proper Digestion for Domestic Abuse Survivors

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships Expert

Live in the Present Moment

"Do not seek perfection in a changing world. Instead perfect your love." --Master Sengstan

Charlotte, a forty five year old computer analyst lived in fear, trapped in a prison cell of negative thoughts. As she learned how to calm down and focus on the present moment she described how good it felt to do something as simple as get a big whiff of the grass in her yard. Like many people who experience anxiety or panic, Charlotte could not enjoy the world around her. She often focused on fearful thoughts, which made things worse.

Read Dr. Miles entire article Live in the Present Moment

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

Learning The Skills To Be An Extra-Ordinary Connector

Learning The Skills To Be An Extra-Ordinary Connector

"Ten Definitive Ways to Succeed at Networking"

How long does it take to establish a relationship? There is no set answer, but it takes time! Your success will grow relative to how much time you're willing to invest.

1. Be a consistent participant.

2. Go to every event PREPARED . . . Cards are a must. Bring your address book/palm pilot as well in order to GIVE leads.

Read Bonnie's entire article Learning The Skills To Be An Extra-Ordinary Connector

Bonnie Ross-Parker, our official Networking Expert

Do You Feel Trapped by Your Guilt?

Have you ever wondered where the guilt you sometimes feel is coming from? Do you think to yourself that you have nothing to be guilty about, yet you feel a twinge of guilt from time to time? Do you wonder if the guilt could be keeping you stuck in less than full mental health? Then read on.

I'm going to suggest one place guilt feelings come from and a simple way to reduce them.

When you were a child you were probably told a number of times that you should look both ways before you cross the street. Then when you mother would check up on you just before crossing a street, you would tell her with glee, "I should look both ways."

Read Dr. Neill's entire article Do You Feel Trapped by Your Guilt?

Dr. Neill Neill, our official Overcoming Alcoholism Expert

Controlling Relationships -- The Choice of Control in Abusive Relationships

Physical dependence, emotional dependence and financial dependence are characteristics we see in battered women. Physical control, emotional control and financial control are characteristics common to abusive relationships.

When we think of the word dependence, in adult relationships in which both parties are physically healthy, we imply choice. When we think of the word control, we deny the reality of choice and instead claim victimization.

But the fact is that we choose to be controlled, just as we choose our dependencies. In working with battered women, I am keenly aware that they know of the choices they make in their abusive relationships. I certainly did in mine.

Read Dr. King's entire article Controlling Relationships -- The Choice of Control in Abusive Relationships

Dr. Jeanne King, Ph.D., our official Abusive Relationships Expert

Relationship Heartbreaks - Part One of Two

The rapture of first love is a tremendously powerful experience that affects us biologically, psychologically, and spiritually. Robert Johnson writes of love in We, Understanding the Psychology of Romantic Love, as an initiation into a state of higher consciousness. It seems no less, but we receive this initiation at such a young age that usually we are without the life experiences that instruct us in the management of the powerful force that love is.

In the 1960s, Dr. Jerry Stern gave a lecture on the poet William Blake, explaining the importance of having a lived experience. To represent the innocent phase, Blake wrote about little lambs and the world of the child.

Read Dr. Miles' entire article Relationship Heartbreaks - Part One of Two

Dr. Linda Miles, our official Marriage & Family Therapist Expert

Is Stonewalling Causing Problems in Your Marriage?

The dictionary defines "stonewall" as "to refuse to comply or cooperate." Does your marriage relationship involve stonewalling? Stonewalling can cause significant marriage problems. It is one of the big four deal breakers or marriage-enders.

Liz and Barry went on a one-week trip to Las Vegas. Their much-needed vacation had been in the works for some time. Both got caught up in the carnival atmosphere for a few days, but then Barry went quiet.

Barry's body language and facial expression shouted unhappiness, but he would not say anything.

Read Dr. Neill's entire article Is Stonewalling Causing Problems in Your Marriage?

Dr. Neill Neill, our official Overcoming Alcoholism Expert