30 Lessons I've Learned from Going for My Dream

I've had a dream for some time to speak to women about living their God-given destiny. In fact, the ultimate vision I hold in my head is me standing on a stage with tens of thousands of people gathered in an auditorium. That vision has been there for years – back when my children were little and leaving them wasn't an option.

I'm still not certain when, how or why that many people would gather around to hear what I have to say, but it's the vision in my head and it leads me on.  The thing about it, it's not some intense desire for fame or fortune. And if I never do it in life, it's not going to gravely disappoint me. It's just this "knowing" like someone gave me a flash forward picture of my future.

In December, I met with two dear friends in Zion National Park; and we spent a week, praying, meditating, and discussing the possibility of bringing women together and helping them discover their God-given missions and live them with courage, vision and fearlessness.

While there we caught the vision of something incredible, something beautiful. We saw what God can do with righteous women who love Him and who serve in their own unique ways, exactly where they stand. We left Southern Utah excited, hopeful and full of faith.

Little did we know that when we returned to put in motion what we'd seen in vision we'd be hit with a series of challenges that would make us question our vision and test our friendships, families, and faith.

Whether the challenges were the adversary seeking to thwart our plans or the chastisement of a loving God, I cannot fully say. Perhaps a combination, but what helped me endure them was seeing them in a different way. Rather than assuming we were doing something incredible and now had targets on our backs for Satan's archery practice, I decided to look at them as blessings.  What if each trial we endured was there to teach us something valuable that we needed to know? What if the challenges would shape us into the people we needed to be to effectively help these women come April 2010?

As I began looking at my challenges in this way, I found the gems within them. Once the spiritual lesson was learned, the trial resolved itself and moved onto the next one.

As I write this, we are less than four weeks away from our event, and I have felt the need to itemize the challenges – not dwelling on the details – but listing the lessons learned from them. As I did so, I realized that I've gained a lifetime of knowledge in a three-month period. It would take most people years to learn these kinds of lessons in a practical, experiential way.

Here are a few of them I learned (or re-learned): 

1. Get to the root of problems. You could spend weeks trying to treat the symptoms whereas fixing the root could take minutes.
2. When faced with a daunting challenge, avoid going straight into workaholic, production mode. Rather, step back and ask God for His perspective. Ask Him to help you get to the root.
3. Avoid the quick "please help me with this" kind of prayers and have a real conversation with God about your challenge and ask for something specific you should do. Many times the solutions to monumental challenges are incredibly simple. And God knows what they are! But if you don't take the time to consult with Him, it's harder for Him to tell you.
4. Sometimes sickness is a blessing to make you step back and look at things differently.
5. Communicate specifically. Don't assume other people understand what you're thinking or even trying to say.
6. Just because you have a hobby you love doesn't mean you should turn it into a business.
7. When you build a life around something that ends up making you miserable, don't shift the blame to the people who helped you along the way.
8. Never abdicate your responsibility to receive your own answers. Other people can be wise and spiritual and give excellent advice. But bottom line, you need to get your own answers. You will be tested later, and if you haven't gotten your own confirmation, doubt will be a monster that plagues you..
9. Everyone's human. Looking for the good in others is a wonderful thing, but don't put people on pedestals. No one is always following the Spirit. No one is always making the best choices. We're all human. It's unfair to expect perfection in others.
10. Some people are never going to apologize. Forgive them anyway.
11. Forgiveness has the power to erase the pain, the hurt and leave the lesson. God really can push the memory of a recent offense so far back in your mind that it feels 10 years ago and has lost its sting.
12. Never stick your head in the sand and hope problems will resolve themselves. Turn and face challenges head on, get to the root and get help quickly.
13. Be careful to never make other people feel that your path should be their path. Let them know they need to ask, seek, and know what's right for them.
14. What everyone else thinks is the "right" thing for you to be or do, could be the worst thing for you.
15. Gratitude is a hallmark of character.
16. A sign of spiritual maturity is that we celebrate, acknowledge and love each other for our unique gifts and perspectives. Celebrating and acknowledging you and what you've done in my life doesn't diminish me in any way.
17. The desires of our heart govern our outcomes, thus the importance of getting down to your core values, core passions and purpose. Be careful what you wish for!
18. Working harder can be a curse. When you think you have to fix everything yourself by working harder, you get in workhorse blinder mode and miss the obvious, little things that could simply and elegantly make things flow.
19. Just because people are around you and see your example of a principle doesn't mean they will understand or embrace that principle. They must desire to learn and be asking the right questions.
20. Putting on a façade takes a lot of energy and stress. Being authentic and willing to let people know you are human is a more energy-efficient and effective way to live. There's more joy, more peace, and more grace.
21. In the pursuit of your dream, some people will interpret the hard things you endure as evidence you shouldn't be doing what you are doing. Just because you face hardships doesn't mean God is telling you you're off track. Only you can know your integrity (remember Job).
22. The vision we receive of the future, rarely happens overnight.
23. When we ask God for a vision, He tends to show us as far ahead as we can safely see. It doesn't mean it will be delivered on the time table you think or want.
24. Never give up. Giving up means you'll have to start over.
25. Use your brain and be practical even in the face of a big vision.
26. Trust God's timing even when it looks like His timing is making your life difficult.
27. Stay focused on the positive.
28. Shift out of fear the moment it rears its ugly head.
29. Find ways to maintain the vision even when it looks impossible.
30. One of the greatest blessings you can have is friends who believe in and work alongside you in your vision. Thank God for them every single day! They may be the greatest miracle of all.

Through it all, I've come to remember that God never wastes the pain. The greatest treasures come from our trials. If you have a dream and you'd like the tools and support group to help you make it happen, please pray about joining us in April 2010. We'd love to have you!

I'm so grateful for the courage and vision of the women (and man) involved in the Light the World Retreat! You're awesome!

Comments

[Karin]

Thank you that was sooo inspiring, Marnie.

[Gina]

Marnie,

Thank you! I appreciate all of your encouragement.

May God continue to bless you. You are a blessing! I needed this so much.

I thought that you were already talking before an audience of thousands of women.:-)

Your God-given vision will come to pass!

Love and blessings,

[VANESSA ANNE GRAY]

I LOVE THIS ~ YOU HAVE TRULY RECEIVED REVEALING EXCELLENT FORESIGHT FROM YOUR LIFE'S EXPERIENCES. THANK YOU ROYALLY FOR SHARING.

GOD BLESS YOU RICHLY WITH ABUNDANT GRACE.
VANESSA ANNE GRAY

[Marnie Pehrson Kuhns]

Thanks for your kind comments, ladies! Gina, I guess it is 1,000's if you count virtual . . . now to get them all together in person. :)

[Martina Muir]

Beautifully said!
Thank you for sharing those wonderful lessons. We all experience trails and when we share our lessons it helps us connect on a deeper level. When God tells us there is "good in all things" - I believe he means ALL things! The hardest things can be our greatest blessings.
Thanks for all you do!
Much Love!!!

[Natalie]

Thanks Marnie

I really love your list. They're a lot of lessons I've learned over the last three months too! They pretty much all say to me to tune into your OWN higher vision, trust it, ASK for spiritual help and then trust in the help you're given and ACT on it in faith.

I was going to single out a few I particularly loved, but then I realised I loved them all! I've been sharing my insights with those closest in my life who're working alongside me on my vision, but I think I'm going to just point them to your list and talk about it from there. :-)

Thanks!

[Kathy]

You really struck a cord with me. As I've been studying just HOW to 'Birth My Destiny',the Lord gave me Isaiah 30 to study. The key came in verse 20: And though the Lord give you the bread of adversity, and the water of affliction, yet shall not thy teachers be removed into a corner any more, but thine eyes shall see thy teachers:
Footnotes
20a
TG Adversity.
b
HEB thy teacher; i.e. the LORD.

None of us walk along on this journey, and we each receive the exact lessons that bring us closer to Him.

Thanks for sharing your insights as an example of receiving divine guidance!

[Hildah Lunding]

Hi there!
I think i have written to you before, but when i was reading your message about the 30 lessons you have learnt, i honestly thought someone had told you to describe me and what i have have been going through!!! Wow! I guess the Spirit is the same!
The vision God has placed in my heart about the great awakening conference:
visit www.wipc.dk

This is such an exciting time we are living in!

[online doctor]

thanks for sharing this one, i guess you have a lot experienced that's why you've given excellent thirty tips for women.

[hebron maghnga]

thank you for that mesege i love it hebron Maghnga

[charity wairimu latz]

thankyou so much for ur generosity and inspiration
God Bless You

[Lyndon Sparks]

Yeah, number 24! It's never over 'til it's over! If you're in a team, you should psyche your teammates up so that all of you will move in one direction.